Signed, Sealed, Delivered..
We’re home.
You hear things, as an unmarried, childless, woman in her mid-to-late 30s. Falling into this category, in NOT ALL but still TOO MANY instances, seems to be an open door to laughable questions and comments while simply trying to check out at the grocery store with your forgotten, and very necessary pint of Ben and Jerry’s, bottles of wine… or some very basic groceries to throw together dinner without a side of judgement before you even make it threw your front door.
I can almost promise you that you will have the pleasure of being asked “why aren’t you married yet?”, “You don’t want kinds?”, “why don’t you want to get married, or have kids, and almost as certainly, (insert whatever “none-of-your-business” question you see fit here) any other question that people find appropriate to ask single woman, anywhere and at any time.
But if you’ve ever gone through a really rough, very long, infuriating, close on a property with your significant other, I can also promise you that you would choose those nosey strangers testing your last drop of patients over the last eight-ish weeks from when we made an offer on our own little peace of perfection, to today, when we finally got to the dotting of all the “I”’s and crossing all the “T”’s.
The stressors of this time, and the circumstances in which we have found ourselves during this time have only compacted the angst we have had about our immediate, and future lives.
And today, as we excitement of FINALLY closing a deal, and starting what we hope is another amazing relationship with another local foodie, I can say with all certainly that none of that noise matters right now.
Regardless of the challenges we absolutely have coming, and the long hours of constant work, the only thing either Nick or myself are thinking about is, home.
Nick and I have visited Peirce Street many times since the day I stumbled upon one little listing for a five acre plot of land with a perfect little pond, nuzzled within a thick tree line off a gravel road in Iowa.. Just far enough away from everything to enjoy a private getaway, but close enough that as we build the next phases of our leafy dream, people will be able to swing by and see the little secrets of dreams we are hoping to create for our community, and all of Iowa, without going too far out of the way.
When we decided to take that first leap, to buy our amazing little storage container farm, we only really had one major problem: we didn’t exactly have anywhere to put it. Bring that it was a high cube, refer, 40’ stoage container farm sitting on top of a full blown semi trailor. One thing that Nick and I can never express loud enough, or frequently enough, is that we are beyond blessed by the people we have in our lives and the unwavering the support that have shown us, not just in this endeavor, but everything, and I do very literally mean everything. Between our families and the amazing friendships we have made, or rekindled since returning to Iowa have been nothing short of awe inspiring. Our little community, whether they are down the street or one of the unspeakably special people that we see, when time allows, or even just talk to when we have a fleeting moment to remind them how special they are to us, the amazing people we have met through a love of food and wanting to do things the right way. The foodies, the lovers of nature, or those who who just want to do things in a way that could open doors of possibility for the generations to come. These are our people. In a quiet way it almost starts to feel like a movement, another step towards slowing life down to going back to a simpler way of doing things and doing it in a way that is sustainable in the years to come. Maybe it’s just our small way of trying to protect our planet while providing a consistently fresh source of produce.. whether it’s June or January. Our dream, our passion for this little leap of faith we took one steamy July afternoon, not at all that long ago, something that would likely not have even crossed our minds without all of the amazing people that love us endlessly and believe in us with the same (albeit, a tad crazy) relentlessness that we do each other! You have all inspired the next phases of our dream!
To answer any lingering questions, no I will not be sharing any of those details just yet!
This life of ours is not neccisarily for the week, and there are times it certainly doesn’t seem to be for the strong either, but when the ultimate goal is to nurture and feed those around you, you risk the moments of uncomfort, put on your big kid pants, and you take the blows with the same gratitude that you do the wins. There are nights when everything goes wrong and it tests your patients and at times your sanity, but I think it’s something that everyone in the food business can relate to, every obstacle ultimately leads to new strengths and a new drive to prove the unseen naysayer wrong… because its important, crazy or not, the one thing we have known from day one is our dream has the potential to bring too much good to all of the beautiful people in our lives, our neighbors, our community, our family.
As I have expressed before, and as I continue to gain more and more of life’s mysterious experiences, the more I truly believe that everything in life is comes down to balance. Learning the importance of boundaries and the art of tactfully protecting yourself and those you love becomes more and more important as it is merely learning to maintain your peace, your balance. I am someone who feels emotions really hard, my values are my compass, and I believe that there IS an exception to MOST rules, but there again, balance.
Learning to stand up for myself was not an easy task throughout the majority of my life, I was a verified “people pleaser” for a very long time. To the point of exhaustion and making myself sick(er). A lack of self worth, a lack of self confidence, and a belief that my struggles were not as significant as others and that whatever it was I either needed to just “get over” or “could handle” lead me into a deep depression with a splash of anxiety and a few other fun ones that we can talk about another day, that I am still learning about and how to appropriately managing to this day. Where I am today compared where I was 15, 10, 2, years ago is night and day. A lot of which can be attributed to Leafy Dreams, my amazing friends and family, and of course; Nick.
I mainly have good days, I try to stay focused on finding and creating the boundaries I need to maintain my balance. I also have days, sometimes several of them in a row, where I feel like all of the progress I have made has gone out the window. I still sometimes struggle with not letting my really big emotions cloud my brain. I am, like we all are, still a work in progress and truthfully that is something that never changes. I don’t want to stop learning, I don’t want to stop understanding, I won’t stop believing in the importance of what we are trying to create out of Leafy.
I don’t share any of these things looking for pity, truthfully the better part of the last couple decades have left a bad taste in my mouth about it. I share it because it is part of my story, it’s part of Nick and I’s story, and it is a part of Leary’s story. I share it because I know first hand how little we know about the people we come in contact with throughout our daily routines and the vast majority of us have something lingering in the back of our heads making our days just a little bit harder. I share it as a reminder to be nice to one another. If you have the means to do something GOOD, you should always do it. I believe that Leafy has the potential to be something so good, and so important for so many people.
I have had a few people tell me that I have lived more in my 30-sum years than most people do in a lifetime. As hard as some of these chapters have been, I know there are people who can relate to many of the things I’ve experienced and if I can help even one person find comfort while they’re feeling alone in the mud, sharing these things will forever be worth it.
I believe that all anyone should be focusing on is living a big happy life. If you have a big bold personality, you should own it, if you’re shy, or stubborn, or on occasion a little too spicy, or anything else you choose to be, you should own it. Accept accountability for the mistakes you make, as we all make them and try to keep the mindset to just be kind and to to tell my people how much I love them and how special they are whenever I get the opportunity. I believe that all of these things are of great importance to all of us as a humanity. It’s hard to keep a positive outlook all the time and that’s okay too but we have to own it, allow ourselves to truly feel it, and than let go of the hold it has on us. Also, something I know is also, really hard sometimes. Another reason to love your people, sometimes that’s the only thing someone really needs: to know they have someone who will sit in the mud beside them, even if there isn’t anything else they can say or do to help.
Leafy Dreams was the first thing I let myself dream about in a very long time. The life that Nick and are building and what we are trying to accomplish is the first really big goal I have allowed myself to set for a very long time and those of you who know me, really know me, also know that for that simple reason I won’t let leafy fail and I know Nick won’t either.
Finding our little slice of paradise to bring this dream of ours to life is so exciting and so scary all at the same time! It’s a huge step in the right direction and we are so excited to start really getting to work on the grounds. We purchased bare land, so before we can really do anything, we need water, electric and septic. The first priority is a two part project: a roof over our heads (details coming soon) and getting Leafy moved over to our land. Ideally the projects will happen at the same time. It’s been a long road for Nick and I to get to this point personally and together, and it will be a long road to get what we’ve lovingly dubed “Project Leafy” to where it’s going. But we made it this far, there’s no turning back now, and we wouldn’t have it any other way!
So with all of that,
Cheers to all the dreamers out there!
May you never stop dreaming!
We can’t wait to share this chapter with you!
With so much love,
and all the leafy dreams
-Amy
#StayLeafy #certifieddreamer
Also, a unmarried cat lady.